Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt.

Hey livejournal,

Sorry it's been a while. I've been busy whoring myself out to various bands and exploring the wonders of scripting in Microsoft GhettoBasic.
I just had to share this, though. This shit is so fucked up. My drummer got this email yesterday. I would remove the email address, but it doesn't actually appear to exist, especially since Myspace and AOL have yet to merge. Anyway, enjoy...

"hey guys ive veiwed your profile on band mix,how's this sound, looking for a lead vox, how bout somthing a little more intence, if your giging and want to aud me e-mail me back at myspace/childoffir@aol.com or both, this is a real measage to do biz, lets talk, im very busy with 2 other aud's this weekend and of course famaly.throw me back and e-mail,why im giving you a measage is because ive lost 50 lbs in gut weight, and can sing like a bird now"
thank's kevin

Why does he have to be named Kevin?

I feel bad that I'm always posting stuff making fun of people. I'm not really like that, I swear.

Edit: Oh wait, yes I am.

Stupidest person ever!

So I work at an insurance company (one of the big ones). I process claims. I process the hell out of them. And there are certain claims (from VA providers) whose ICN's (Internal Control Numbers) need to be put on a spreadsheet on one of our network drives so I can find them in the midst of all my other waiting claims and do weird things to them. But there's this one lady who just never puts them on there, so I have to stumble across them... ANNNYWAY...
today this lady came down to ask my supervisor why the spreadsheet had all this yellow on it. See, I had been highlighting all the claims I processed, using the handy Fill command in Excel. Apparently she thought the yellow highlighting meant there was something wrong with either the claims or the spreadsheet, which is why she wasn't putting the claims on there. She was afraid she'd screw something up. What prompted her to talk to my boss is that she tried to insert new rows in the spreadsheet and they also came out yellow. oh my god!
So after several emails and tearful recriminations, the upshot is that now she's putting the claims on there, but I can't use yellow highlights on them anymore because it freaks her out.
I think she's the Green Lantern.